havadan sudan [blog, writing, travel, yoga]

So many people are talking
in my mind. Are they crazy or am I the one who is craziest? I am just a poor human being having heaps of stuff to do, however who prefers occupying her
mind with all these famous people. If you ask whether I am
famous or not, maybe I have the so-called “hope against hope” getting
famous by the help of these celebrity creatures who you can’t see on TV or some
popular magazine.

Let’s get to know our actor
and actress of today:

Adam or Adem or Soil or the
Man: definitely a loser in my eyes. the one who ate the forbidden fruit. was it
really an apple? (I wouldn’t exchange the garden of eden with a red and
goodlooking apple, however for a nice basket of delicious smelling strawberry,
I could consider this offer.) It took him some time to recover his sorrow about
this expulsion stuff. Nowadays, he is enjoying his retirement days with his
wife Eve in their nice house with swimming pool, watching regularly TV to see
how/what their millions of kids doing on earth, having his daily problems but
never giving up being a macho.

Eve or Havva or the Living
One: the
first unlucky woman. there are millions of men still in the belief that she was
created from one of the ribs of Adam. Probably, she was aware of Lilith (Adam’s
first wife), I think she had to say yes to Adam because there was a serious
lack of men at that time. She is spending her retirement days in the same house
with her macho husband Adam. She got used to hear the everyday-blames of
feminists on her. This doesn’t disturb her anymore.

Battle of Adam and Eve (or scientifically known as
Battle of Sexes)

Eve

: Why does Adam fall asleep after sex?
Leyner & Goldberg : Eve, well you know, it is better first you buy
our book. Allright, buddy? You know, this copyright in US. We know, you are
going to buy (some emotional teasing, is it something very american or?) so we
will try to help you, our friend.
Leyner & Goldberg: “There are many hormonal changes that occur
with orgasm and some of these changes may offer an explanation for why men fall
asleep.” (so put all the charges on hormones, men, your lucky day today!)
Adam’s turn…
Adam
: Why does Eve pee more than me? I always
have to wait in front of the bathroom and it can sometimes be very painful, you
know.
Leyner & Goldberg: “This is because men have a larger bladder
capacity. That means smaller bladders of the ladies.”
Leyner & Goldberg: one last question, ok? Eve’s turn…
Eve
: Why does Adam never listen to
me?
Leyner & Goldberg: “Scientific studies show that for men the
female voice is more complex and more difficult to hear and understand.”
So it is not fault of Adam. He is incapable of listening you. Maybe you can
change your voice or something.
(Men are obviously supporting each other thinks Eve and so do I)

Adam & Eve :
Thanks a lot Leyner and Goldberg! You are good sons of us. We are proud of you!
Leyner & Goldberg: It was our pleasure! See ya around! Ciao!

Edit:

1. The BOOK: Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex: More Questions You’d Ask a
Doctor After Your Third Whisky Sour by Mark Leyner and Billy Md
Goldberg, Three Rivers Press
(I haven’t read the first book of them called “Why Do Men Have
Nipples?” yet. But this second book helped me quite a lot to reset myself
after reading too many nice novels. Why did I mean with resetting?
Absolutely, gaining the energy to restart reading some nice novels.)

2. The PAINTING: “Adam and Eve” (1912) by Marc Chagall (Well, he is
famous but I don’t know him very well. All I know is he took inspiration from
Belarusian folk-life and portrayed many biblical themes reflecting his Jewish
Heritage.)

Bu
yazı, ilk defa 13/10/2006 tarihinde havadansudan.azbuz.com’da yayınlandı.

Neither I am Eve, nor I am talking about Adam. Moreover,
I have some strong doubts that they have ever existed. Despite this ambiguity,
there is no reason not to benefit from Adam’s name by using it in marketing text. I find it quite smart. You know, people love that kind of
stuff.

Me : Morning Adam! How are you doing
today?
Adam : (He doesn’t need to say anything, because he is always
fine, so I usually don’t listen his answer )
Me : (talking to myself: I hope that
I can manipulate him to talk about something not boring as usually
I can do)
Adam : well, you know it is about tradition/culture that makes American people to behave friendly to others.
Me : yeah, I know. But I can’t stop asking why
German people have to be that unfriendly.
Adam : Was it your first time in US?
Me : yes. (hey, I told you many times before but
you must be thinking something else)

Today’s hits are people ignoring others, challenging people (in
relationships) and commonly expectations…

Adam : So you loose your interest in everything when you cannot
interact.
Me : Exactly! It is strongly connected
with the first topic, you know. When they don’t let me to interact with them, I
feel like they are ignoring me. I need to talk, Adam. I need to get feedback
about myself or how I did/said. They don’t like to talk in any personal level.
What are we if we are not persons? So I cannot understand this personal level
thing.
Adam : (if I were him, I would ask: “who are
they?” “you are always talking about them.”)
Me : Mumbling, (he doesn’t hear this
part.)…well, you know me is me and they are the rest of the people or rest of
the world living in Berlin. I am the perfect one and they are all against me
who are enjoying so much being against me.
Adam : So, you say that you find 3.5 million inhabitants of
Berlin are boring. (I am sure, he thinks I am crazy.)
Me : Yep, Adam.
Adam : Better you reconsider your expectations (I see, our favorite topic… inevitably popped up again.)
Adam : It is not bad at all to have high expectations. On the
other hand, you know normal people have different expectation categories, not like you, not only great
ones.
Me : Ok, I will think about that. (how
will I? I don’t know. Maybe I should google it or something)
Me : Bye Adam, see you next week! Have a
great week! I am sure that you will…

Bu yazı, ilk defa 12/10/2006 tarihinde
havadansudan.azbuz.com’da yayınlandı.

“The Science of
Sleep” by Michel Gondry: Tamam, kabul ediyorum sinema uzmanı değilim, bu
film beni Amelie gibi kalbimin orta yerinden de vurmadı ama uzun zamandır
seyrettiğim en ilginç, en tuhaf, en eğlenceli filmdi diyebilirim. Gael Garcia
Bernal’in adını da bu akşam bu filmi izleyinceye kadar da duymamış hatta Amores
Perros’ta oynadığından da dolayısıyla bihaberdim. Şimdi Amores Perros’u
seyretmek için daha da büyük bir istek ve merak duyuyorum.

Bu akşam, bu filmi seyretmek
için biletlerimizi almadan önce bir grup insan hiçbirimiz filmin hangi dilde
olduğunu bilmiyorduk. Koltuklarımıza yerleşip, film İngilizce başlayınca
hepimiz şöyle bir derin oh çektik. Ardından Fransızca konuşmalar başladı.
Stephane’in İspanyolca aksanlı Fransızcası daha filmin başında bile o
kadar güzel geliyordu ki kulağa.

Filmin konusuna gelince:
Meksika’da birlikte yaşadığı babasının ölmesi üzerine annesinin ısrarlarıyla,
utangaç ve kendine güveni olmayan Stephane Paris’te ufak bir apartman
dairesinde yaşamaya başlar. Stephane, yan dairesine taşınan Stephanie’ye karşı
bir şeyler hissettiğini fark eder. Gerçek hayatta duygularını kontrol etmek
için mücadele içinde olan Stephane, uykusunda kendisini düşler ülkesinde bulur.
Biraz zaman ve alıştırma ile rüyalarındaki olayları kendi amaçları için kontrol
etmesini öğrenir…

Filmin pek çok yerinde
olayların gerçek mi hayal mi olduğunu anlayamadım. Fena halde kafam karıştı.
Gerçi, gerçek veya hayal olmasını biliyor olmak çok da önemli değil.
Stephane’in Stephanie’ye söylediği bir cümle var insanı derinden etkiliyor.
“Everybody is boring but you are different.” Sanırım şu çok komplike
ve aynı zamanda da basit olan aşkın tanımı bu cümlede gizli.

Filmi seyrederken,
insan var olmayan (yahut hayallerde olan) golden the pony boy’unu tamir edip
tekrar koşmasını sağlayacak kadar ince düşünceli biriyle karşılaşabilmeyi
diliyor. Yönetmen, mucizeler yaratmış film boyunca. İnsanı bir ağlatıp bir
güldürmesinin yanı sıra aşkla ilgili sorularla başbaşa bırakıyor,
duyguları harekete geçiriyor. Tüm samimiyetimle söylüyorum: Stephane gibi biriyle karşılaşamasam
bile onun o kendi tasarımı takviminden bir tane odamda olsun çok isterim. It
definetely changed my life… Close your eyes! Open your heart!

Bu yazı, ilk defa 11/10/2006 tarihinde
havadansudan.azbuz.com’da yayınlandı.

Sometimes, do you feel like
doing nothing? Or is it only me having this feeling more than often? It is one
of these days, I could have a lot to do, fighting with my inner inertia but I
am not able to do anything. I just got an email from a friend. He was wishing
me good luck with my every-minute questions and he attached a painting in jpg
format to the email. With all my curiosity, I googled it and I saw it was
by a person called Michael Wardle who is living in Las Vegas. First, I
thought about the name. It took me a couple of months to learn how to pronounce
German “Michael” and American “Michael” correctly. I couldn’t
easily understand why they didn’t find a new way to write “Michael”
in US. Maybe they were just lazy, who (n)ever knows? The second thing was about
Las Vegas. Less than a month ago, I changed the plane in Vegas. I wish I could
have time to see this desert city, not to gamble but to see people gambling. In
the third place, I started to have a look at the painting itself. It is obvious
that I tend to spend more time on details than the topic itself. Anyways (as he
always uses this word), the colors of the painting , I thought it is just
great! yellow, red and some blue… Immediately, I saw a half-full wine
glass. Freud probably would say that I feel the need of having alcohol. Maybe,
that’s true. Besides, I see some pain in the painting. I don’t know, maybe it
is like a mirror which is reflecting myself to me at the moment. The body
is looking to another direction than the head does. Does it mean that the mind
and the heart (body, instincts etc.) contracting? and there are several birds…
Honestly I don’t like modern art and modern paintings. Because there is always
a high probability of not being able to understand what the painter was trying
to tell (or do they tell/imply something) and to feel yourself such a fool.
Well, the very last part of the story is the reason behind. We like or not
there is always a reason behind everything as the Americans say. Sometimes, I
feel like I have too many questions and have no idea of how I would move on. On
the other hand, I see things at certain times that they are clear like looking
through the cleanest window. It is like up and downs: clean-dirty look… But
inside is always clean as he has this yellow color in. He didn’t know where to
go, nor do I!!!

Bu yazı, ilk defa 10/10/2006 tarihinde havadansudan.azbuz.com’da yayınlandı.